Angie!!!

Fairy Tales are Childs Play

2007-09-04T18:16:00.000-07:00

I see you sleeping in the crib
I see you dreaming of the future
Dreaming everything is going to be perfect
Everything is going to be like a fairy tale...
But, you'll be in a never-ending nightmare
One that leaves nasty scars
One that you can't wake yourself up from
Yes you'll fall in love
Just like in fairy tales
But you'll end up heartbroken all in the end
You'll tell your self "everything is going to be okay"
Over and over again
When nothing changes and you hear what happened to him
You'll go crazy
You'll go suicidal
Then your dreams will be about dying
Saying goodbye to everyone will be your one and only request
Until you meet someone new and fall in love all over again
Unfortunately you'll still love your first,
But your dreams will no longer be about dying,
But having a family with your new love
Dreaming of the long awaited future
Dreaming can no longer be child’s play but only a reality
You are going to have to let this reality play its part
You will learn to let go of the first
But you know in your heart you’ll never truly forget him
Just being around the other one helps everyday
Just hearing his voice as he declares his love for you
Everything about him is perfect
He’ll make you see things in a different perspective
He’ll make you see that there are gentlemen out there
The ones that take your bags
The ones that open doors
The ones that, are kind and caring
Don’t let faces ever fool you again
Don’t let fairy tales come true
‘Cause fairy tales never teach anyone about what really goes on
Fairy tales are no longer a toy to be played with…

the comment i left for you

2007-07-26T20:58:00.000-07:00

you think you've fucked up but i don't.
if you think you need to fix things
don't fix them by your self
let us fix them.
i'll never leave you all alone.
i'll never let you do somethin thatz this imporant to you all by youself.
i want to be there.
i want you to see i do believe in you
and every word you say.
only cause i love you too.
no matter how you want me to mean it.
i'll alwayz mean it....
cause i can never lie to you
espesially when i say
"i love you"

how many times a day i tell myself i miss you

2007-06-19T23:07:00.000-07:00

if i could count how many times a day i tell myself i miss you
i'd lose count all on the very first day

your there now always on my mind
i wish there was a way i could see you every day now

if i could count how many times a day i tell myself i miss you
i'd lose count all on the very first day

you'd sit across from me and not even notice
as i walk right passed you and whiper to myself

if i could count how many times a day i tell myself i miss you
i'd lose count all on the very first day

you stand next to me holdin my hand
and wouldn't hear me when i would say

if i could count how many times a day i tell myself i miss you
i'd lose count all on the very first day

i now lay under you
and you whisper to me

"if only you could know how many times i wanted to tell you "i missed you"
you'd lose count
if only you knew how many times i wanted to reach my hand out to you and tell you
if only you knew--"

if only i knew how much i wanted him to know how i truly felt...
and now i lay wrapped in his arms as he says to me
"if only you knew how much i never want to let you go
so i wouldn't have to deal with the pain of listenin to myself count how many times i tell myself 'i miss you' "

if i could count how many times a day i tell myself i miss you
i'd lose count on the very first day...

now i know how much you care
only because we felt the same
when we were apart...

marks the memories

2007-06-08T11:31:00.000-07:00

there are marks now...
marks that tell me what i did
they remind me of what we did
where we did it when i got them
how i felt when i got them
my smile creps on my face every time remember what we did

but i know they won't stay forever
will the memories also fade as well
when the marks go?
is that when i have to say goodbye for good?
i don't want to though...
because i truly do love you and
i never want to forget what we did that one night...

nothing is hidden

2007-06-07T09:54:00.000-07:00

nothing is hidden behind my true eyes
only the pain I've had from past fights
only the tears i try to hold back but can't
there is nothing that I've hidden from you

I've told you everything
I know about myself
you want to know more though?

stay by me and you can...
stay near me and never let me fall again
these are the orders i want you to only obey

anything you desire

2007-06-05T15:09:00.000-07:00

tell me everything you desire
everything you want me to do to you
i'll do it no matter what
a bite?
a kiss?
blindfold you?
to sleep next you?
anything you want and i'll do it
i just want one thing in return...
and thatz to know you...
that you love me
even if it'z just as a friend
or more
thatz the only thing i ask in return
even if i end up with another broken heart...

icicle teeth

2007-05-01T08:54:00.000-07:00

His cold teeth met with her sensitive skin as he broke it, Amy's body collapsed under him giving him complete control over her. Amy's blood slowly got sucked as his meal for the night. When he brought his teeth out of her, two holes were left also with blood trickling down here and there not wasting a drop he licked her neck at the puncture marks and where he saw blood. Making her shake every time his tounge licked her neck. Amy knew what was going to happen the next night and the nights to follow, because this is something she wanted, she gave into him, because she fell for the night and for the vampire that was sucking her blood.

His blue eyes were the firt thing that attracted her to him in the first place, but every night they would go out she started to see more than just his blue eyes. His smile he gave every now and then, his tall body, his long arms that wraped around her when she would get scared or he just wanted to hold her thight in his arms and not let go, his voice when he would call her name, his kind heart that he showed just to her. Amy knew everything or so she thought she knew everything until one night when they weren't suppose to meet.

Amy decided to walk down the street from her house instead of takin a taxi like everyone has alwayz told her to do, but the thought just swept in one ear and out the other.

what a Bargan

2007-04-30T08:04:00.000-07:00

"damn kids" the student teacher thought "i can't believe they act like little kids sill!" He turned the door knob to go in to the bathroom and when he closed the door behind him he saw the 2 worst boys in his class that he teaches. "hey Mr. Idol" one of the said.

After Death in a New Life

2007-04-12T08:06:00.000-07:00

The cops had heard a shot and came running inside only to see a lonely girl lying dead with tears still falling down her face, and a shot right to the head. Maybe when I’m reborn I can meet you again, and fall in love with you all over again. I want to go though the same pain I had with you, and the same happiness, I just never want to say goodbye to you again.

When we are reborn I want to be the same age as you when we meet again. I don't want to remember what happened in the past life, I mean it’s not I didn’t like it it’s just I don’t want things to feel weird. I just want to make a new life where we share pain and mostly happiness.

I want go to the same middle school with you and have stupid little fights, like little kids have when they’re in elementary. Stand by your side when something is wrong, and I want you to do the same when I’m in trouble or crying. I want you to be there even though I say go away. I want you to say, “I’ll never leave your side no matter what you do to me.”

Then when we graduate from middle school we’d have a party with all of our friends, no parents. We’d have our first experience with alcohol, because “someone” spiked the punch, that someone being Andy of course. And of course Andy also brought the smokes, so then would have also been our first experience with cigarettes, because we fall into peer pressure all the time.

On the first day of our freshmen first year in high school we would find out that we had one or two classes together, and we would also have lunch together because the school separates the fish lunches from everyone else. We didn’t care because all of our friends were there and we stayed together all the time just like a school of fish in the sea. We would meet of course other people that are upper classmen. They would skip sometimes to our lunch just to hang with us, and we’d do the same for them.

Our upperclassmen friends would bring cigarettes and/or drugs ever so often. On those days they’d invite us to go off campus with them, and of course we’d go because we fall into peer pressure all the time.

I want Andy to come out of the closet sophomore year. I want to be a little a freaked out because he’s one of my best friends but then the next day I want to love him like he’s my sister because in my heart I always knew he was kind of gay, just scared to say it. I want you to be jealous because I hang with him more than I do you, but soon you’d learn to accept him because you’d find out that he was gay and not just playing around. Yet I want you still to be a little freaked out because Andy thinks you’re really cute.

When junior year comes around I want us to be some sort of drug free but ever so often like once a year we’d go smoke some pot that we’d bought just to celebrate that we survived a New Year. I want you to finally ask me out when the end of the school years comes around and I’d say yes, because I’ve liked you since middle school. I want you to be my first love again.

Then when we graduate high school I want to raise my diploma in the air and say, “I gradated” and have tears running down my face when I see my underclassmen friends sitting in the stands cheering for me with tears also running down their cheeks and my parents there crying too, because there only child is a high school graduate. I want you to be they’re getting your diploma also, and our friends still cheering and tears still falling from their eyes.

I want there to be another party for us graduating from high but I want this party to be somewhere secluded, like somewhere you’d see a scary movie being filmed. I want all our friends there again even the underclassmen that were at our graduation but again I don’t want any parents there. I want to get so drunk that I start to cry again and I would start to mutter, “I don’t want to leave school, I don’t want to leave my friends.” I want you to be there still by my side holding on to me saying everything is going to be ok in the real world.

Then I want you to pull out this little square box and open the top and ask me to marry you. Andy of course still at my side like a little puppy covering his mouth with a small little scream, and I would say yes.

Close to the end of the party I want Andy to make the biggest scene so he can get everyone’s attention to make the announcement that you just asked me to marry to you. Then when everyone hears about it I want them to come running up to us and ask if it was true.

I want Matt, that’s liked me since fish year to come walking up slowly and pull me away from you and take me outside where no one could see us. “Why?” Matt would ask looking down at his feet and his hands on my shoulders, “why Adrian”. I would say with out any hesitation, “Because I love him.” I want to try to walk away from Matt, but feel the pain that he has and stay to comfort him. After the party I want everyone to have a D.D, designated driver and get home safely.

I want the wedding outside when the sun is about to set. I want Andy to be your best man. I want my 3 best friends as my bridesmaids, and there dresses to be light green and my dress to be lavender. I want Matt to be the photographer of the whole wedding. I want my dad to walk down the aisle with me with tears descending down his cheeks and not just him with tears but all of my old underclassmen friends too, and Matt with small tears also. When I get to the front I want my dad to let me go and he’d go sit down mom who would have started to cry even before I started to walk out. Of course the preacher would take forever in reciting the vows, but it didn’t help when we wouldn’t say anything for a while either. Then when we finally finish with the vows I want to walk back down the aisle with you and everyone throwing up little flower petals as we went past them. When we get end of the aisle I want to turn to you and give you another kiss and say “I love you” and I want you to do the same for me.

I want to grab Matt away from his camera and have at least one dance with him. I want to share one dance with all of my friends that came and my family, but I want to save the very last dance for you and only you.

When we’re 25 I want to have our first child. We’d want it to be a surprise so I didn’t go get a sonogram. I wouldn’t care if it was a boy or a girl, but you would want a baby boy. Even if it were to be a baby boy I’d still dress him up in the cutest little clothes. We would think of names I’d argue that he wasn’t going to be named Adrian Jr. When we came to a conclusion of the name it was time.

I wouldn’t want to take the epidermal. You would stand by my side, and Andy, his boyfriend, Matt, and his girlfriend would be in the waiting room. I want it to take 12 hours for our baby to decide to come out and to our surprise I would have twins, one baby boy and one baby girl. Isarel would be the baby boy’s name and Adrianna would be the baby girl’s name. “I’m never going to say no to the epidermal again” I want to say after giving birth to Adrianna. I want to hold them and hear their cries before I fall asleep. I want you to go get Andy, Matt and company and tell them the news. When I wake up I want you sitting beside me with our babies in your arms and Andy and Matt playing with them.

(still working on it.)

2007-03-28T09:12:00.000-07:00

Between 1933 and 1945 Sinti and Roma (“Gypsies”) suffered greatly as victims of Nazi persecution and genocide. Building on long-held prejudices, the Nazi regime viewed Gypsies both as “asocials” (outside “normal” society) and as racial “inferiors”-believed to threaten the biological purity and strength of the “superior Aryan” race. During World War II, the Nazi and their collaborators killed tens of thousands of Sinti and Roman men, women, and children across German-occupied Europe.
-United States Holocaust Memorial Museum

When young kids these days learn about the Holocaust, they’re manly taught that the only people there were the Jews. They were never taught that Jewish people weren’t the only ones that were taken to the concentration camps.

My name is Jana. I’m a Roma (“Gypsy”). My people were also taken to concentration camps. We were told to line up in two lines, one line for men and the other for women. The women got on one train and the men got on a different train. On the way over to those camps my little sister, Luminita and me had heard screams from the other carts on the same train we were on. Both of us were terrified every time we heard them screams. We held on to each other, our eyes shut close hoping this was all just a bad dream. “Jana you’re not going to leave me are you?” Luminita asked.

“I’ll never let you out of my sight.” I responded to make her feel comfort.

There was a lady trying to get off the train from the small crack in the train cart. When she got out there was a shot heard. Everyone rushed to see what had happened and saw the lady lying on the ground with blood coming out of her chest.

When we got to the concentration camp the women in the train carts were almost pushed out. There was one camp made just for us though called Zigeunerlage it was in a horrible environment, right next to a sewage dump and a cemetery in Berlin.

The German demons pushed us to the entrance of the camp. I got separated from my Luminita, and when I looked back to look for her, I ended up seeing the demons drag dead bodies out the carts. There was one pile of hundreds of Roman woman lying on the ground, dead. What were they going to do? How did they die? Then that’s when I remembered the awful smell in the cart that I was on had.

Luminita and me didn’t see anything because we chose not to leave the spot we were at except when we heard the shot. The smell in the cart was the smell of sulfur.

King of Ace

2007-02-01T08:56:00.000-08:00

INT. HOUSE WALKING TO MOM'S ROOM

Gabe reaches for the doorknob to open the door.

GABE
Mommy I had a bad-

KATIE (MOM)
Gabe! What are you doing up right now! Go back to your room!

GABE
I had a bad dream and wanted you to sing me a lullaby mommy...

A man comes up from under the covers.

MAN
Come on Katie were not done yet.

KATIE (MOM)
Not now. My kid just came in.

GABE
Mommy who is that. He’s not daddy.

INT. POLICE STATION

Gabe is now 25 and now goes by King of Ace. King of Ace is now sitting in the Interrogation room and tells his story about why he became a murder.

GABE
Night after night it was like that. I never saw my pops and my mom didn’t have time for me anymore. All those guys she slept with took her away from pops and me. Use to love the woman, but now I’m glad she's dead. Guess what? I was the one that killed her too and all the men she slept with.

Eternal Sunshine Response

2007-01-31T08:34:00.000-08:00

i'm not all that sure about what technique i want use.

one thing that wont work inside the short film would be the second plot.

screenplay thoughts

2007-01-22T08:11:00.000-08:00

school life
rewrite a of story of mine to a screenplay
relationships
friends
random new story

dream come true

2007-01-10T08:25:00.000-08:00

Sitting,
Waiting for another boring day to go by
Staring in to his eyes
Getting lost inside them
Seeing what’s really inside of him.

Sitting,
Waiting for another boring day to go by
Stroking his beautiful long black hair
Thinking about desires I know I can’t have
Closing the gap between us that we once shared.

Sitting
Waiting for another boring day to go by
Lying next to him
Holding on to his hand
Knowing this isn’t a dream anymore

~Angie~

Acrostic

2006-11-28T08:58:00.000-08:00

Any poem whose lines' first letters vertically form either the alphabet, the poet's or dedicatee's name, a concept word (which can look hokey, but not always), or even entire sentences, if the poem has length. These go back to the Babylonians, but many poets, even modern ones, have fooled around with them. (Anne Sexton did, for instance.)

I - Influencing the minds of
N - New generation of people
D - Destined to lead the world
I - into a new world
A - And
N - Negotiate life’s
E - Eternal puzzle and twists
S - Satisfying the quest for
T - Truth

Love

Living life together with
Only one person, and
Value
Every single moment of it

clerihews

2006-11-27T08:03:00.001-08:00

Clerihews have just a few simple rules:
1.They are four lines long.
2.The first and second lines rhyme with each other, and the third and fourth lines rhyme with each other.
3.The first line names a person, and the second line ends with something that rhymes with the name of the person.
4.A clerihew should be funny

Sir Humphrey Davy
Abominated gravy.
He lived in the odium
Of having discovered sodium.

Bentley

this is about Kayleigh
she went to bailey.
she likes to hide things,
like her little angel wings.

senryu

2006-11-27T08:03:00.000-08:00

If you can count syllables, you can write a senryu [Sen-REOO]. It doesn't rhyme, and it doesn't need a title. Senryu is a Japanese form of poetry similar to the haiku, since it is made up of only three lines with the same syllable pattern of 5-7-5. It is the subject matter that makes a senryu different. While a haiku deals with nature and seasons, a senryu dwells on people matters; it can even be funny!
2 First let's look at how a senryu breaks down into a total of seventeen syllables.

I doze on the couch. 5 -I/doze/on/the/couch.
The cat moves in, making a 7 -The/cat/moves/in/ma/king/a
Bed of my stomach. 5 -Bed/of/my/sto/mach.

gone

can't feel anything
but the coldness in my heart
because you're gone now

Tritina

2006-11-21T08:53:00.000-08:00

Being modeled from the Sestina, there is no rhyme scheme, instead it comprises of three stanzas using the same three words in a Sestina like pattern, and a final line which uses the three words in the starting sequence:

A.. B.. C...
C.. A.. B...
B.. C.. A...
A,B,C...
The meter is not specified but is usualy tetrameter or pentameter.

Peaceful and quiet is this evening.
Like a thousand diamonds, the many stars
glitter in the velvet sky, and the fragrance of jasmine-

the sweet, heavenly fragrance of jasmine-
perfumes the warm air of this June evening.
The smiling moon glows among the winking stars.

And as I lie here tonight beneath the stars,
breathing in the delicious essence of jasmine,
I revel in the beauty of this evening,

this perfect evening, with the sparkling stars and the moon's smile, white as a jasmine blossom.

by Kimmy Kastner

Shining moon

As I lay they’re crying
I see the moon shining
Though the puddle of tears

Thinking I shouldn’t be here with these tears
There is nothing left for crying
there is nothing shining

nothing out there shining
it's way for me anymore. let the tears
start coming. let me start crying

i want to stop crying, but tears keep making this puddle that lets me see the moon shining.

Hate

2006-11-19T14:06:00.000-08:00

I hate that I love him so much,
but he hates me now.
I love how my friend is a back stabbing bitch,
and she does too.
I hate loving him,
and I hate seeing her with him.

A dark night for me and you

2006-10-10T17:37:00.000-07:00

There was an awful smell and the color red was everywhere. "What happened here?" I asked. Then, that's when everything came flooding back to me. The pain, the tears, the sounds, everything. The pain I felt was like no other! O god why did I have to remember all of it. I wanted to forget that's why I did what I did.

Two years doesn't mean anything to him. All the time that we had spent together didn't mean a thing. My eyes had a flood of tears flowing down them. Then I started to think, " What if we were to brake up would it be a good thing, I guess our age difference is a problem." We had sat on the couch that brought us together on the first day that we met I still remember the first words he said "hey, I want to make a deal with you, if your not going to be happy by the end of the day I'll leave and you wont ever have to see me." well by the end of that day i was the happiest person. Even if i wasn't, i think i still would like to see him some more.

As i came back to reality he asked me, "are you going to be ok?"

"yeah I...I'm going to be great." I stutter in saying with my tears still flowing from my face. "Of course not you idiot I just spent the last 2 years with you. I feel in love with you!, but that doesn't mean shit to you!" I thought.

He got up and left me there to cry my life away. He doesn't know what I'm going to do, even though he should, he did help me stop...Well so he thought... Ah there it is, my little friend that's been there for me since I was 14. O' me and my little friend have been threw a lot. It was there for me all the times when I was depressed...It helped me sometimes feel at ease, when I saw the blood come out of my wrist.

Once I picked my friend, the razor, up it was like a trigger because someone ran into my house holding what seemed to be an old 22 hand gun. "don't move, don't scream, don't do anything!" the man yelled.

The man came over to me thinking I was scared and put his arm around my neck. "I don't care anymore. I can scream and you'll kill me, I can move and you'll kill me. Man you barge into the wrong house at the wrong time mister." I whispered to myself.

"what are you mumbling about." the man said bringing the gun closer to my head.

Apparently the man that is holding me by the neck and pointing a gun to my head is a rapist and a serial killer. His description fitted him perfectly, 6ft Mexican-American, short black hair, and weighed about 160. The way this man here killed his victims was that he raped the poor girls first then killed them after he was done. The poor guy had to come barge into my house. He doesn't know what he's in for, because right now I don't think I can take shit from anyone.

The rapist became panicked, because he had heard the loud scretching sirens from cop cars, and saw the bright blue and red lights that pierce through the courtins. "your surrounded, come out with your hands up!" The policeman said.

"If your not going to pull the trigger I'll do it for you" I told him as I grab the old 22 hand gun from him. As i grab the gun i started thinking about all the what if's.

the cops had heard a shot and came running inside only to see lonely a girl lying dead with tears still falling down her face, and a shot right to the head. "I...I...Didn't do it! I swear. She took the gun and shot herself! i didn't do it" the rapist kept repeating.

The next day Adrian had came over hoping i was ok. Rehearsing over and over what he was going to say "i'm sorry Emi. when i got home last night i couldn't sleep a weak because I really regreated what i did. Do you think you can forgive me? I really do love you." As he turned the coner he saw police cars and caution tape all around my house. "What happened!? Were's Emi!?" Adrian said almost with tears coming down.

"i'm sorry sir, but last night we found a dead body it would be helpful if you could go to the hopitol and see if the body is your Emi." The police officer instructed. Before the police officer said anymore Adrian dashed off to his car. Speeding with no care of his surrounding. Thinking "oh god let it not be her, please god!" over and over.

When he arivied he asked the nurse at the front desk if there was an unidentified body that came in last night. "Yes there was. She also had a note in her pocket. Would you come this way please?" the nurse said. "Can you tell me what kind of condition she in?" Adrian asked still scared.

"umm...we didn't know who she was so we could call any family to tell them that she died last night." The nurse said. Adrian stopped walking as the nurse told him the bad news. the nurse gave the letter to Adrian, because she felt that he needed to read it. "Hey there, I don't know if your going to get this letter, but i just want you to know i'll always love you no matter what, and i wrote you a poemfor you so you can know how much i really do love you.

the time we spent together
the first time we ever spoke

our little dorky jokes we made to each other

i remember it all.

i love going back to our most happiest moments

and remember all the laughs we shared

i guess my only regret was,

nothing

i love you and

i never wanted to say good bye

i'm sorry

love you always

~Emi~"

lost

2006-10-04T20:01:00.000-07:00

i'm so lost now
i sit waiting in the same place like i was told to do when i was a kid
"stay put if you get lost, we'll come find you"
where are you?
are you lost too
if so are you doing the same thing that i am doing
if were both doing the same thing then how are we suppose to find each other
"meet me "
i hear someone from afar say
"were the only light shines in this dark empty pit."
i walk toward the light
not knowing if i'm going to trip, fall, or die
i don't even think that i'm not getting an closer to the light
but i won't give up
because i know i'll see him there
waiting to greet me with open arms
and a smile that i can never forget.
i can see the light now!
but there's no one there...
no one to greet me
no one with open arms
not one smile was under that light
just a little girl crying because it was a lie,yet another lie.
now i'm even more lost
should i forget about him and turn back?
i don't think i can do that anymore
because i am lost for good now in a pitch dark heart

(alternate ending- to bad
i don't know the way out of a pitch dark heart.)

my words

2006-09-27T08:22:00.000-07:00

The greatest conflicts are not between two people but between one person and himself.
-Garth Brooks, Country Music

this made me think, "if conflicts are between himself then why do we argue so much? why can't we just face the fact that we made the wrong choice and get on with our lives with out fighting."
"Crows", by Christopher 14, was a man vs creature. "Crows" takes place on halloween night in front of a old red barn and a corn field. The conflict is that there is a creature called "the creature". "The Creature" loves to eat young girls with thier eyes ripped outm or the lower half of the man.

a feeling called love

2006-09-19T18:47:00.000-07:00

I never thought I’d cry again,
But you change me.
You made me find something, I thought I lost along time ago.
This one little feeling called love.
Your smile was so bright it lit up my dark heart.
Your laugh was so wonderful I wanted to open up,
Just to hear it some more
And now here we are lying side by side,
Never to leave each other's side ever again…

Blood stain tears (or even after death)

2006-09-18T18:36:00.000-07:00

He use to always skip school
no one ever payed attention on those days
just the days he did come to school
he'd come into class with a depressing look on his face and sat at his desk everyday when he came to school he was like this
I just thought he was sad because he had to come to school
he came over to talk to me
he said he had a problem
I saw what he hid from everyone under his sleeves.
"I can't stop, please can you help me?" he asked
I fell to the ground shaking there were red marks that were new
and brown marks that were old
every time closed my eyes I saw those marks
every time I tried to ignore it
I heard his voice over and over
racing threw my head saying
"can you help me. I haven't been able to stop since I started."
I did my best to help him
I learned that his parents had past away not to long ago
he did have any brothers or sisters
when I started to help him
he started to come to school more often
he came into class with a smile on his face
everyday I tried to help as much as I could
everyday I had spent with him I started falling in love with him a little more every time
there was one day he didn't come to school
no one notice but me
that was the only day I ever skipped
a whole day of school
I ran to his house were we had met everyday after school heart broken
when I found him...
I couldn't believe what I saw
and still can't
his image is still in my head just as fresh as the first day I saw him
lying on the floor
blood everywhere around him
my knees shook and I couldn't control my self anymore
I collapsed into a puddle of his crimson blood
there was a note sitting on his bed
"Dear my helping Angel,
I'm sorry. This was my final try, and if I don't die, I promise, no I swear I'll never try again. If I do die, I'm sorry I left you. I know you tried your hardest, it helped a lot! But I still felt a little broken. I don't know what it is but everyday I woke up with this pain that I can't describe. The pain never went away unless I forgot about it but that was only when I was around you. Every moment we spent together was the best, I wanted to spend every second with you, just so I can forget this pain. Before I say my good bye I wanted you to know that I love you...And I always will I just don't know if you felt the same. One last thing, don't do anything stupid like what I did.
Love,
Tony
P.S
I'll always watch over you every single day."

not caring
I fell on top of his dead corpse
his blood on my cheeks with tears flowing like a river of blood
"Oh god, why!!... why couldn't you wait one more day...One more second...Just so I can tell him that I do love him."
the knife he used to kill himself ws so close
"no. Please don't do it"
I heard a voice say in the back of my head as I was starting to reach for it.
no one was there for him at his funeral...
just me
just my lonely blood stained tears.
was his stream to swim.
living life without him was hard
trying to ignore his final words was even harder.
now I'm the one coming into class with my hung down
as I look at his desk I see he sat in,
and broke down tears
waiting for my time to come
when I can be with Tony on last time
to tell him that I do love him...
...Even after death

But I don't want to cry

2006-09-13T05:44:00.000-07:00

I fell like crying
But I don't want to cry
I fell the water of my tears covering my eyes
But I don't want to cry
I fell the watery river of my tears flowing down my face
But I don't want to cry
I taste the saltiness of my tears as they go over my lips
But I don't want to cry,
I don't want to cry,
but it's to late I've cried so many times

commit

2006-09-08T08:04:00.000-07:00

I'm thinking about 2 pieces I want to publish. The first one is one that I've been working on since last year, "a new life". My second piece is one that I wrote this year, called "kids now-a-days" this is just about how us kids don't shut up when our teachers are giving direction, and we don't know how to shut up.

http://www.32poems.com/

http://www.antithesiscommon.com/

right now the only thing i think i can chage would be the last 2 lines of this poem/thought.

Publication

2006-09-05T20:04:00.000-07:00

http://www.32poems.com/
Submissions Periods Open to submissions from Friday, September 01, 2006 to Tuesday, May 15, 2007

http://www.antithesiscommon.com/
Publishing schedule September 15, 2006 December 15, 2006 March 15, 2007 June 15, 2007

kids now and days

2006-08-30T08:44:00.000-07:00

I can't hear
I can't concentrate
there's to much noise
I wish people would learn to just shut up
then maybe our schools GPA wouldn't be so freakin low
teachers probly hear this all the time
"i don't understad. can you repeat what were suppose to do?"
if i was that teacher i would tell those kids
"well if you would learn to shut up maybe you would have heard what i said!"
but then i'd probly get fired right then and there
were so stupid,
us the kids
we fail and don't ever give a rat's ass
we'll say "aww i can always just take the class again"
even though you passed the 2nd or 3rd time you still really failed
all because you didn't give a rat's ass the 1st time

No logger

2006-08-22T09:00:00.000-07:00

The tears the once showed on my cheeks hide themselves now from everyone in the world
except from one person
the person who they were for
I have to hide everything now
maybe when I finally feel free from the world one last time
I'll show the tears one last time and show the world the things I hid from them
the tears can fall like a waterfall one last time
for the last time might mean the last time
for me in this world
or just for everyone in this evil world

A new life

2006-08-18T08:23:00.000-07:00

The sun raised and I found something that felt different
that something was new
a feeling I thought I lost along time ago
as my salty tears fell onto her beautiful dress
but she didn't seem to care.
she held me in her arms that felt so comforting
and I couldn't help but cry
now I undertand why they go to her.
her comfort
her words
even when she doesn't talk she's there
just to be there for anyone
I wish I trusted her the first time we met
Then I wouldn't have been put threw so much pain as I am now.
when the sun had set my pain was gone.
and i felt and ease for once
sleeping in her arms that kept me safe all night long

Long time ago

2006-08-18T08:09:00.000-07:00

I miss him
but he doesn't care
he turns his head, as I look him in the eye
he turns away from me and says...
"I don't know you, get away from me."
as those words slip out of his mouth my heart sank.
and my depression comes back to me
I wanted to drive the sharp knife across my wrist
one last time
I wanted to say my final good bye
I just wanted to fall asleep
one last time and never wake...